Called home


I’ve had a lot of vivid dreams lately. Almost all of them involve travel in one way or another: airplanes, buses, trains.

And my mother is in almost all of them, and so is my sister Susan, both of whom are long dead.

What’s going on here?

I miss them both. Mom was angry and difficult, but I loved her, and I know I’m very like her. Susan was probably very much like Mom (to be honest), and we fought terribly when we were young, but by the time we were adults we were good friends.

So it’s very natural that I dream of them.

Mom died in 1999; Susan died in 1995. Susan told me, a few months before she died, that she looked forward to seeing our father in heaven when she got there. “But,” she said ominously, “you know who won’t be there.”

I knew whom she meant. “Susan,” I said, “I know. But I’m just as bad as Mom. I’m going where she’s going. Look for me there.”

“Okay,” she said.

I only hear from Mom and Susan through my dreams nowadays.  Susan is very loving, and always hugs me (she’s still a little plump, even in heaven). Mom often looks and acts cranky when I encounter her in Dreamland.

I used to see them in my dreams once in a while. Now I see them all the time. Over the past few weeks, I’ve seen them almost every night.

Are Mom and Susan trying to tell me something? Are they calling me home?

I wonder.

If this blog suddenly stops, you’ll know that something has happened.


About Loren Williams
Gay, partnered, living in Providence, working at a local university. Loves: books, movies, TV. Comments and recriminations can be sent to

3 Responses to Called home

  1. starproms says:

    No, no, not your time yet Loren – really!

  2. starproms says:

    ps I think you are getting these thoughts because the seasons are changing. It’s the same with L and me. It’s a feeling of drawing in on oneself before the winter comes.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: